lovehandlesdontluvuback

Just another WordPress.com site

Day 78: I dont know what I’m doing

I woke up on a better side of the bed. I dealt with my issues. Funny how that works. Today I’m at work. I’m ok with this. Its windy out today so I feel fine with being inside. I’m really talking about my feelings.

We are slow on Sundays and man the Easter aisle always beckons me to visit, so I did and decided I wanted to make Easter baskets. I bought a bunch of candy and baskets and grass and eggs, etc… 15% off suckas!!! I put some candy in a few prescription vials and I’m sending them to my grandmom. I chuckled at that idea. My will power is dwindling cause I had a little bit of candy. Tell me, is it ok to have a few little cheats here and there or to save them all for one day and go over board? I’m starting to think that I might be ok with a few here and there as long as I dont let it get to where I was pre-TBT. I dont really look forward to “cheat days” cause what if half of one day and half of the next contain two events that have a cause of a cheat. See, too much thought into all this. Not worth it.

Supplements/Vitamins:

Biotin, Prenatal, Gluc/Chon, Cinnamon, Fish Oil

Eats:

1/2 clean muffin, GF pretzels and almond butter

2 egg whites, 1 egg with a tad of goat cheese, 1 peice of Ezekial toast, bit of GF pretzels

1/2 clean muffin

Some trail mix

2 clean muffins

Very healthy clean tuna sandwich (no mayo) with lettuce, pickles, whole wheat bread

Homemade potatoe salad

1 very small bite size Kit Kat

5 M&M’s

3 Whopper Easter eggs

Salmon, brown rice, arugala

Chocolate milk shake – fail

IPA beer – fail on my stomach

Exercise:

None

Advertisements
4 Comments »

Day 77: Hot

Happy Stoopid Green Drunkard Day. Not really, but thats how I felt on St Patty’s day.

My man friend took me to Steamboat to go to the Hot springs for my birthday present. It was so nice there! It was an oasis of awesomeness. If you can check it out, it was only $10 bucks to go in the hot springs. I’m still amazed by them. Reminder: google “hot springs” and see how they are in this world. After a certain time of the day “clothing is optional.” We were there early in the day so I did not get to see any naked glory. Boooo I did try and de-pants my man friend multiple times. We were a classy bunch in the steamy wonderland.

We left there around noon then drove back to Denver. I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, I knew why too but I didnt want to talk about it. I was pleasant but I new that the Hermit Erika was about to come out full force. The drive back was beautiful and I cant say enough about my man friend, he rocks.

When I got back into Denver all I wanted to do was curl up in my bed and sleep and watch Hulu flicks, drink a beer alone and eat stuff. It was so nice. Being alone and anti-social does a body good sometimes. However by 10:30pm I called man friend and told his drunk ass to come to my King Bed Oasis. He happily obliged. I did get to see a girl pee on my apartment’s front lawn. Her and my dog would get along great! Case in point: douchebags are out in full force on 3.17.12. Her other douchy loud friends “covered” for her. I was secretly hoping she would get caught by the cops and have to register for Megans Law as a sex offender. Wishful thinking.

Supplements/Vitamins:

Biotin, Prenatal, Gluc/Chon, Cinnamon, Fish Oil

Eats:

2 clean muffins

Decaf coffee with powder creamer and 1 sweet and lo (the hotel had a coffee maker!! score!)

2 sips of a nasty yogurt smoothie

Few scrambled eggs

3 or 4 bites of a cinnamon bun -CHEAT

Decaf coffee with skim milk and 1 splenda

1 clean muffin

1/2 of a Kind Bar

2 veggie “meatballs”

1/2 of a chickan salad wrap from Whole foods

GF pretzels and fresh organic almond butter

1 Vanilla Porter beer

Take two: 2 veggie meatballs, 1/2 of a chickan salad wrap from Whole foods

GF pretzels and fresh organic almond butter

Exercise:

Slowly moving around the Hot Springs

Other unmentionables

2 Comments »

Day 76: Oh I’m on this!

Oh Irish weekend, how silly thee arg. Everyone is Irish this weekend. Lucky for me I am 50% so I am golden!  I dont even drink that much so I’m all talk buuuttttt I may have a few brewski’s tomorrow and I had one today.

Breaking news: I went to boot camp this morning and I felt greeaaattt!!! like Tony the Tiger great. Say it…. say it…. Everyone was very nice to me and so I felt welcome back. Even accent boy, Adam said “You back Erika! Great, see you Monday!”  Then I creamed in my pants. Not really but sorta. I feel back and ready to attack. I also already signed up for the next 5 week program that starts April 2nd. I am soooo on this thing.

Today I had off and my besty friend had some of her besty friends in town from Ohio so I joined them in a lazy sunny Friday pre-St. Pattys day festivities of lounging and drinking. I had a beer and then classed it up with a glass of Chardonnay. God I wish I could drink beer all day (not really) but I just dont have the make-up for it. I was not designed that way. First off I get buzzed with A glass of wine so drinking beer all day would make me feel bloated and gross, oh and wasted.

Tonight my man friend is taking me to the hot springs in Steamboat for my birfday present.  We are going to have un-protected sex!!! lol just joking.  I will proceed to kiss his face off though so dont judge me. Judge free blog zone right here. We will probably get some dinner on the way there and I will choose wisely grasshoppers. I promise.

Supplements/Vitamins:

Biotin, Cinnamon, Prenatal, Gluc/Chon, Fish Oil

Eats:

1 clean muffin

1 clean muffin with a thing of peanut butter from boot camp ( friday turned into people bring breakfast day?)

A tad bit of trail mix

Grilled Mahi mahi fish tacos with corn tortillas, bit of refried beans and rice (I’m apparently addicted to fish tacos)

1 Corona beer (aka shit)

1 glass of Chardonnay

I will eat a healthy dinner I will eat a healthy dinner I will eat a healthy dinner (kinda buzzed)

Exercise:

Crazy boot camp!!!!!!!

4 Comments »

Day 75: Gobbledy Gook

I get these emails at least once a day from my boot campers and I feel disconnected from what they are doing. Uh probably cause I’ve been sick and have not been able to go for two and a half weeks. I responded to all today and explained that I had the flu that progressed into walking pneumonia and would they ban me if I came tomorrow and the last week. Overwhelming response: No. Who knew. So I will force my ass to go to boot camp in the morning even if it means I need to bring my inhaler and cough up a lung. Its harder to breath as of late and its not that I”m pushing myself too hard, its just what it is when you have been really sick and getting over the lingering stuff. Gobbledy Gook.

I feel like I have been laughing a lot lately. A lot. Yet I do not know what to write that would prompt a chuckle.

Fresh Face!

Supplements/Vitmains

Biotin, Prenatal, Fish Oil, Gluc/Chon, Cinnamon

Eats:

1/2 cup rice krispies with some honey

Some Quinoa with tofu curry veggies

Clean muffins

More Quinoa with tofu curry veggies

Decaf iced latte with skim milk and sugar free pump of vanilla, one splenda

Handful of animal crackers

3 dark chocolate kisses

More Quinoa with tofu curry veggies

Exercise:

5 mile run

1/2 of Ab ripper X

12 swings of the kettlebell

Few wide arm push-ups

1 Comment »

Day 74: Meh

I woke up again this morning to go to boot camp and stood in my kitchen for 10 minutes paralyzed by the thought of going. I instead slept all morning then met a friend for lunch before work. I did do a teensy bit of abs and the kettlebell but thats all. Not sure whats going on in my head, I feel tired. I do see an improvement in how my jeans fit since I have been sick and I know that if I keep cheating and not working out I’m going to lose it. I’ll get there, I just need more time. On the bright side I have been doing little cheats each day instead of one big cheat day. Dont worry I am not patting myself on the back.

Supplements/Vitamins:

Biotin, Prenatal, Gluc/Chon, Fish Oil, Cinnamon

Eats:

One cup of rice krispies with some honey, 2 bites of a homemade from scratch brownie (dont worry I gave them to my man friend so they would be out of site)

Few left over sushi pieces with brown rice, two spoonfuls of quinoa curry tofu veggie dish I made

Two grilled fish tacos on small flour tortillas, few bites of coles slaw, steamed veggies, some crab claws, 1 piece ahi tuna

Handful of animal crackers and 2 Hershey kisses (dark chocolate), 2 bites of a Think Thin brownie bar (no sugar, GF)

Homemade Quinoa with tofu curry and veggies

Bite of Think thin bar

Exercise:

Some Bosu ball abs

Some Kettlebell swings

Few push ups

Leave a comment »

Day 73: I’ve fallen off the wagon

I did not go to boot camp again this morning. I think I am nervous about being away 2 weeks and it being so intense. I’m still coughing a lot and dont feel myself. I feel extra tired and sluggish. I’ll get back in the swing of things, I just need some time.

Supplements/Vitamins:

Biotin, Gluc/Chon, Prenatal, Fish Oil, Cinnamon

Eats:

1 cup of rice krispies with some honey

Handful of animal crackers

Some sushi with brown rice and bit of edamame

Take two: some sushi with brown rice and bit of edamame

Failed: 3 Hershey kisses and a handful of animal crackers

2 homemade from scratch brownies

some homemade quinoa curry tofu veggie

half vanilla porter beer

Exercise:

Ran 5.2 miles

Speed walked 2.55 miles

2 kettlebell swings 20 kg two sets of 12

Bosu Ball abs

5 Comments »

Day 72: There are more colors than brown

My intention was to go to boot camp this morning but when my alarm went off I pushed off, I wanted to sleep. I wanted to sleep all morning and so I did.

Work was a sauna, the air was broke and it was 80 degrees in the pharmacy. As the day progressed I was getting more and more sluggish. Took my lab jacket off. Felt dizzy and nauseous. I called and put an emergency “ticket” in to our help desk and made up some story that the meds cant survive in heat like this. Probably true but more like I couldn’t survive. I was melting and red faced. Ugh. Double Ugh. I work for a company that makes billions right? Dont get me started.

I’m reeaalllly having a break down with the TBT. I feel like I dont care anymore, not completely, just a little not caring. Like when I ate rice krispies today or when I ordered tacos. I’m trying to get re-motivated. I really am. I hate to blame it on being sick but I think that is what did it. I feel like I have to start from scratch working out and that is daunting. I have no appetite for veggies and if I step into another F-ing Vegan/Veg place like Watercourse I might freak out and yell at the wait staff to stop trying so hard, stop with your glasses and your stupid different shades of browns with extra frump. I would, however, return for the chocolate vegan milkshakes. I’m a fare-weather friend.

I’m trying to be positive. Dont read my blog if you want to be motivated cause this gal is not having it right now. I’ll try to go to boot camp tomorrow morning and then re-evaluate how I want to spend the remainder of my TBT experience.

I did read Boosh’s blog after I wrote this and felt more motivation happening within my bones… I hope to extend this feeling into Tuesday.

Supplements/Vitamins/Meds:

Biotin, Prenatal, Gluc/Chon, Fish Oil, Cinnamon, Antibiotic

Eats:

4 left over pieces of sushi with brown rice

2 cups of rice krispies with some honey, dry

2 fish tacos on corn tortillas, refried beans and some rice, chips and guac, some salsa

1 jolly rancher

Dinner: feast of 5 dark chocolate Hershey Kisses and animal crackers

Exercise:

3 Comments »

Day 71: Irish day started early

I woke up feeling much better. As soon as the sun goes down I turn into a sick person. Thank gawd it stays darker longer now! Got up early from Blackhawk and drove to the Running of the Green 7k run downtown. The only time I second guessed my sickly run was at mile 3 when I felt like I was going to faint and die, but it quickly passed. When I finished I was coughing up a lung, which is always awesome.  I tried to take a free beer, cause its free!!!  Took a sip and then threw it away. Wah Wah. I did grab a banana and walked home. Surprisingly feeling great after just feeling not so great. Bi-polar sickness!

Rest of day I felt good just a nagging cough that I’m sure will be around for a bit longer. I decided boot camp is happening tomorrow morning. I have two weeks left of it and I want to take advantage of the good workouts.

Spent the majority of the day sitting on a blanket at Washington Park with my dog and my man friend.  I convinced myself (easily) that I was going to drink a beer.  I could not resist, it was Yuengling and although you can find it out here in Colorado its not very common and it reminds me of my old stomping grounds of Philly. And it was sunny. And it was on a blanket at a park with yuppies playing volleyball and playing frisbee. It had to be done. And I’m an American.  I also easily convinced myself that TBT starts again on Monday and that today was the last day I had to dwell on my sickness and cheat beyond reason.

Supplements/Vitamins/Meds:

Antibiotics, inhaler

Eats:

decaf skinny mocha

Oatmeal with some brown sugar and nuts added

1/2 banana

sip of beer, literally

Two Wahoo fish tacos on corn tortillas, brown rice and black beans

Slice of pizza – not worth it

Some sushi with brown rice

Two scoops of peanut butter crunch and mint brownie ice cream from “Sweet Action” – worth it

Exercise:

7k

Walked the 2 miles(?) home

4 Comments »

Day 70: The Amerifat hotel

Oh hello birthday weekend and all the fun that ensues.

Woke up early and went Skiing.  I’m seriously a bad ass “sick” person.  To be fair I have been feeling a wee bit better and the antibiotics are pretty amazing, but I just threw some cough syrup down my throat and I was good to go hitting the slopes!  It was so great too cause it was warm, I practically skied in my underwear (not really) but totally could have it was that nice. Love. Colorado. So. Much. Obsessed. Need. More. Stagnant. Sentences. To. Seem. Cool.

Then after skiing we mosied on up to Blackhawk to celebrate a fellow freinds birthday! (I secretly was extending my birthday celebrations and piggybacking onto hers….she so cool that she let me….and she rocks).  This consisted of a very nasty dinner where the waiter was for a lack of nicer terms, stupid.  I felt very judgemental in Blackhawk.  Driving in my first thought was “everyone is fat,” “Why is everyone fat?” I guess since I now fit into my skinny jeans I’m all bitchy and what not.  Whatev. Hey! It took 2 weeks of being on my death-bed to get me into those jeans!!!  Lay off! (Chris Farley voice).  Hence my “Grrr” with TBT once again cause it does not matter. If you starve yourself, either directly or indirectly. THATS how you lose weight. Fuuuuuu.

But I digress. I swam in the pool and felt like a kid again for some reason, I could not stop giggling. Ameristar is a ghetto Vegas but I’d go back. In a year, maybe. As the night went on I went downhill. As in I started sounding more like a man and coughing a lot more and feeling weak….. I adjusted by changing out of my 4 inch heals (which were my friends btw cause I forgot shoes and a bra), swigged some cough syrup with codeine, popped two Tylenol, inhaled my inhaler and was good for another hour. Then bed.

Supplements/Vitamins/Meds:

Antibiotic, cough syrup of multiple kinds, Motrin, Tylenol.  Funny I’m not taking my vitamins when this is actually when I probably need them the most. I kind of went on a hiatus after 3 years of being very consistent.

Eats: This was my main cheat day

Starbucks decaf skinny mocha

Starbucks ham and cheddar artesian sandwich

Rice Krispie treat

1/2 of  a beef soup with some saltines

1/2 of a Turkey BLT on white bread and few fries with BBQ sauce

2 eggs over medium, piece of whole wheat toast, sip of Veggie Beef!!! soup (gross), some stolen fries, avocado

2 bites of MLD’s bday chocolate cake

Exercise:

4 hours of skiing

30 minutes of swimming

2 Comments »

Day 69: Happy birfday to meeee

Lets be 10 years old and point out that this is day 69. giggle giggle and it happens to have fallen on my birthday. Meant to be.  That shit is awkwaaard!

Most of my birthday was spent in my bed sleeping (great birthday fo reals) and then a Lobsterific bday throw down at THE Red Lobster. Bibs were worn. Fun was had. My man friend was overwhelmed with the unlimited refills and had to say “stop, please. No more soda” Lightweight. I ate very healthy actually considering it was my Birfday. I had succulent King Crab Legs sans butter, but I did have a biscuit. Sue me!  But that seriously was it, I was still not having a great appetite.

I’ve been having weird thoughts about TBT again and wondering if I really want to do this anymore…. feeling of the moment.

Supplements/Vitamins/Meds:

30mg Sudafed, 1 puff of inhaler, 250mg Azithromycin,

Eats:

Few sips of tea – cant get into this, cant.

2 Big spoonfuls of homemade Rice Krispie Treats

Few sips of Carrot coconut soup and 1/4 slice of Quinoa black bean salad wrap

Bit more rice krispie treats

King Crab Legs

One cheesy biscuit

1 piece ofbroccoli

Exercise:

2 Kettlebell swings 20lbs 12 count

Some Bosu Ball abs

Cleaned my house and de-infected the whole thing

Laundry! Its in the basement!

Leave a comment »