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The sweatpant chronicles

on November 17, 2012

I woke up feeling feisty! Hot Diggity Dog!  (btw, saying “hot diggity dog” to things you do not know how to respond to is a fool-proof way to prevent ‘wrong responses.'” Works every time)

And by feisty I meant, irritable and hormonal. As I get closer to the birthing process I have been more moody.  All I can say is I have been a champ for 9 months, I deserve this time.

After sleeping in, then getting up to eat some raw cookie dough (I lost interest in completing the task the night before) and a swig of orange juice I took a nap on the couch for 2 hours.  I then got up to drink some water for the baby and eat some Raman noodles sans spice packet, strategically draped over the bowl so it would become cold.  Then it was time for my 2 hour, out of sweatpants, time to take a very domestic trip to Target and buy “important” items for the “hospital” bag.  Such as: Sour gummy worms, a toothbrush, some Gatorade (full calorie), travel size Cheez-It packets and one thing of strawberry banana yogurt.  I never eat yogurt, but felt compelled it would complete my “hospital” bag.

We returned home, baby daddy installed both car seats into our cars, we laughed about the absurdity of our lives, and then I returned to my infamous XXL sweatpants (which I wore pre-pregnancy mind you hence not feeling guilty around man friend) and took another nap on the couch while half watching the Create Channel on public television.  I am all very content with this.  Until I get the friend motivation to go out for food, which we do, Sushi.

Now, I have a long history of awkward conversations/situations with waiters and waitresses.  Why I thought this would be different… I did not.  I’m already nauseous but I wanted a “safe” roll and some edamame.  Server lady had a really awkwardly placed mole near her chin/lip.  It was not my fault the lighting in that place made me feel like a blind grandma!  I seriously could not look away from that mole because for the life of me I could not figure out if it was a piercing or a mole.  My eyes would not leave that place on her face.  I was stuck!  I had no control.  By the time I figured out it was in fact a mole, not a piercing the damage was done, she hated our table.  I too have a face mole!  She is one of my people! I let down my people.  They left out the strawberry in my roll and I was so pissed.

Here is a random chronicle of my 2012:

I started this blog at the beginning of 2012, my anthem was End the Shit Show!!! Adele was my mascot. Florence and the Machine was my anthem (Shake it Up)!  My grandmom even told me, “Erika, 2012 is your year!” Well, it all came true. 2012 has been the year to remember and I’ll tell you friends, if you build it, it will come.  Perhaps not exactly my crazy chain of events but whatever works for you…. let me enlighten you:

Yogi, my dog of 5 years, my buddy, my traveller through life, passes away very suddenly due to kidney failure

I went on a Match.com date, four days before my membership expired, to ultimately find the love of my life

Getting insanely sick for a month that left me with walking pneumonia and two trips to the Urgent Care

Getting pregnant, 2 and a half months after my Match.com date. Fuuuuuuucccckkkk, easily interchangeable with either a question mark or an exclamation point

Going to Japan while insanely sick with morning/all day sickness

Quitting my job because retail can suck it!

Getting a new job because I’m an F-ing lucky SOB

Going to Mexico while not enjoying a fruity drink and wanting to puke my brains out

Moving into a new place with said love of my life

Selling my house in Colorado Springs.

Getting a new puppy.

Getting engaged.  Hello.  Insert heartsy fartsies here

Giving birth. Soon.

_________________________________________________

2013 Better rock!  haha

Vitamins: Prenatal, Fish Oil

Eats: raw egg, OJ, Raman, edamame, sushi role with ghetto strawberry on the side, lame.

Exercise: Walking to the bathroom ALOT.

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